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The car pulls
to a stop and I wake up from the uneasy sleep during the ride to see what’s
waiting for me outside the window. I spot people, people, and people. I open
the car door and step out lightly. I can feel the hot, burning sun on my face.
I walk toward the flamboyant blue castle gate, like I’ve seen in movies. I see lines
of people, crowds of people. Their faces are lit up with expectations and
excitements that wait for them behind that blue gate. I, too, walk toward one
of the small entrances where people are lining up. The lines are so long, I already
am sweating so heavy from the heat around me- the people, the sun, the
anticipation. It’s finally my turn to step into the gate, to see the wonderful
things that’ll be waiting for me right there, for some fun.
Red, yellow, blue colored balloons float
in the air. I see happy couples with their couple t-shirts, kids running around
with pink and white cotton candies. In the air I smell buttered popcorns,
sweetness of cotton candies. All around me I hear strident screams, shouting,
high-pitched shrills from the rides that look so much fun. People line up
orderly and patiently for their rides but they can’t hide the fact that the air
seems to be burning around them. Fanning each other, sipping on drinks, sweat
running down their cheeks. I buy myself a cup of ice-cold coke. It’s there in my hands
and I can feel the coolness it gives to my warm hand. Within seconds my hands
turn cold, I bring up them to my neck and the coolness again spreads to my
body, freeing me from the heat, satiating my dreaded thirst. I walk around a little bit more, until I come
across this ride that catches my attention.
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OMG!! Your writing is so good! It's so descriptive and amazing! Your vocabularies are not difficult to understand which is good! This reminds me of the smell of the food hahaha. It also reminds me about the time when I went into the rollercoaster and shout as loud as I can. Keep up you good work. I’m looking forward to the next one. :)
ReplyDeleteYour writing is really good. The choice of words is really good and it makes your writing vivid and fun to read. I can actually put myself in your shoes. Your writing makes readers continue to read and readers can also relate because you wrote in first person. Good Job!
ReplyDeleteSirapob Mongkolpiyathana period 8
A very nice experience. I love amusement park too. Haha. You describe the place well, it's like I'd been there myself. I could feel the hot, buring sun on my face too. I wish to one of that ballon... I love ballons... especially yellow one... Anyway, if you want to feel the thrillingness you have to seat at the head of the roller coaster or the very last. Huhu...
ReplyDeletep.s. CLUCK. ↗DRRR-RRR-RRRRRR-RRRRRR↘KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Wonki Hong Period 6
Wow! This is great! Your essay really reminds me the last time I went to an amusement park. Your work is so descriptive and I really enjoy reading it. It is easy to understand, yet, interesting. You really impressed me. I like how you described the place. It is so interesting. You described every single details you saw. Nice work :)
ReplyDelete- Kanyarak K. (P1)
Wonderful! Your essay is very good. I can imagine what did you feel when you went there. It inspires me to go to the amusement park again. It was interesting. I really enjoy reading your essay. I agree with you that when we played the rollercoaster, we could give out our stresses, worried, heavy burden away. Great:)
ReplyDelete-Thitaphat T.(P8)
Amazing writing, Alice! I can imagine both myself being in the same roller coaster as you, and picture you riding the roller coaster as well. Yes, I was giggling and I can feel that ticklish feeling in my tummy. This makes me want to go to an amusement park again. I love how you described every single detail you felt as soon as you got to the place, how you felt before and after riding the roller coaster, and of course, when you were riding it. This is impressive, and I can again, feel myself riding a roller coaster just by reading it. Keep it up! :)
ReplyDelete-Regina Hutagalung, p8